nihilism | Jake's Little Void

Comedy, hope, and suicide.

Posted on Oct 8, 2019 by Jk Andrew

Do you believe that life has inherent meaning? Are you one of those people who thinks that every action we do has greater implication than how it initially appears? Or are you like those who believe that there is nothing more to ‘now’? That everything is what it appears to be, and that no guiding force, no universal order is at play? While a debate between these two opposing question rages on, which I honestly think will never reach a satisfying conclusion, I believe there is another more pressing question to ponder: Will it matter if if does or doesn’t? I will not give you answers, as I do not have them. I am merely exploring, trying to just scratch the surface of this age-old question. Join me as I yet again reflect on this through the lens of the highly-acclaimed film, Joker. And of course, spoilers ahead.

Nothing but a FLECK of dust.

Arthur Fleck or Wayne (we don’t know for certain) is a pitiful Gothamite. For someone who experienced pain and misfortune day after day, it was quite amazing, and frankly, inspiring, to see him put on a happy face through all of it. The sobering reality in this film is people like Arthur really do exist. He could be the drunkard we pass by the train station everyday, the hobo who routinely looks for scraps at the dumpster, or that yuppie who, at face value, looks like he has his shit together. But dive deeper and you’ll see he barely holds it all together. These people keep trying to better their lives. In Arthur’s case, he knew he was facing mental problems, hence the psychiatrist we see him talking to at multiple points of the film. He took medicine to combat this illness yet life seemed to JUST WANT HIM DOWN. Life, society, call it what you want, relentlessly kicked him down figuratively and literally. French philosopher and journalist Albert Camus perfectly captures the struggle and exhaustion Arthur exhumes throughout the entire film:

“Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.”

Camus is well-known for his take on absurdism, which, simply put, means that life has no inherent meaning. This philosophy is the subversion of everything that religion or anything that implies meaning in the grand scheme of things. In Joker, we see this type of absurdity right from the get go when a couple of teenagers steal Arthur’s sign board, bait him into chasing them, and finally beat the living hell out of him. Or during the bus ride when he was called out by the mom of the child he was making smile. The entire film is absurd.

Stairway to madness.

Arthur’s slow, painful descent or (ascent) to madness is what I’d call logical. Yes, logical. Arthur did try to change his status and even his condition, seeing how he kept on working on his career as a comedian and see the psychiatrist in hopes to at least cope with his mental problems. He had hope. He was resilient. Arthur was many things wrong but he did not just snap like a twig. There are man factors to consider on what led to his descent. What arguably was his tipping point was his mother.

*How would you react if misfortune like this happened to you everyday?*

Penny Fleck, played by the praise-worthy Frances Conroy, was the source of Arthur’s unstable character way before society kicked the hell out of him. She herself suffered from a mental illness – psychosis and others more – which opened an avenue for abuse. Don’t get me wrong, the illness wasn’t the direct cause of Arthur’s own. It was the subsequent physical abuse that came from Penny’s former boyfriend. This led to a traumatic childhood for the young Arthur that ultimately led to his then-present condition. Given his unpleasant childhood, do we get to blame him for the person he turned out to be? For the circumstances he didn’t choose to be born in? We’ll never know.

We live in a society.

I mentioned society numerous times for valid reasons. And besides, we knew it was coming. Society created Joker. What I mean by society creating Joker is that the people, the government, Gotham itself created him. From the corrupt officials stealing the resources meant to improve the lives of the citizens they have sworn to serve, to the indifference of the Gothamites themselves towards their fellow citizens, the hypocrisy of the rich who promise a bright future to the poor, and many more reasons to list, all these factors either directly or indirectly created chaos incarnate we all love to hate.

Killing 3 Wall Street boys as his first debut as the Joker, Arthur’s action (or reaction to the injustice dealt to him) was seen as a righteous vengeance, a resistance if you may, by the suffering majority of Gotham. From this stirred beast arose chaos, anarchy – rebellion. It’s almost as if the sleeping majority was just waiting for the first move, and in the afterglow of that movement, anger, resentment, rage followed suit. Once more, Camus had the right words to describe this:

“In order to exist, man must rebel, but rebellion must respect the limits that it discovers in itself – limits where minds meet, and in meeting, begin to exist.”

After his first stunt, he began to exist in the minds of Gothamites, hence he began to rebel. Arthur was finally becoming noticed and he wasn’t letting this opportunity slip away. He began to have an idea of who he was or rather, who he was supposed to be, thus he further asserted himself on Gotham. We must assume that, in all the pain and suffering he experienced, Arthur believed his rebellion against the system, against society is right. Camus, in a way, affirmed Arthur’s actions by saying:

“Rebellion cannot exist without the feeling that somewhere, in some way, you are justified.”

And he is right, I believe. That Arthur wanted to be noticed was seeded in the entire film, and fully blossomed during his biggest moment: his appearance on live television. During his brief appearance, Arthur expressed all his resentment towards society and materialized it by killing Murray Franklin. This created waves throughout Gotham which fully awakened the sleeping beast.

Society birthed Joker. Can we blame him for it?

Toy Story 4 is terrifying.

Posted on Jul 8, 2019 by Jk Andrew

Bloodthirsty werewolves, disemboweled undead, knife-wielding dolls, immortal serial killers, godlike devil clowns, sparkling vampires, and occasional in-laws. These are the typical visages horror films take up, with the plot usually revolving around fear of the monsters themselves. This trend is what the fourth entry in the Toy Story series attempted to break, and break it, oh it did so intimately, by surreptitiously portraying random ways the universe can break our spirits any time. Toy Story 4 grabbed fear itself and wrapped around it cute, colorful, and highly detailed images of childhood which resulted to the darkest “children’s” movie in recent memory.

Woody — the natural death of a purpose

Taking off from the soul crushing ending of the third installment, our beloved cowboy had his purpose “die” from no longer being Andy’s and “reborn” after becoming Bonnie’s. While his early times with Bonnie went well, everything changed in a flash! His would-have-been similar purpose as a child’s toy was radically changed after his ward slowly had a change of heart, effectively removing Woody’s supposed purpose in “life”. Without spoiling too much, this is one of the central plots of the film, if not the main one, although arguably the most forgiving of all the “spirit breakers”. Woody’s fate reminds us that no matter how hard we try, sometimes, things just won’t go our way and we have to learn to live with that.

Forky — forcing onto us, a “new purpose”

Imagine having everything in your life already set: born, grow, work, age, die. It’s a relatively “peaceful” life cycle. But what if in the middle of it, the hands of God strip you away from it all and re-brand you with a new purpose? The instinctive reaction is to be frightened, terrified, even. And terrified was what Forky, a spork-turned-toy by Bonnie the deity, did for a good amount of his screen time.

“I AM NOT A TOY. I WAS MADE FOR SOUP, SALAD, MAYBE CHILI. THEN THE TRASH. I’M LITTER! FREEDOM!”

This new purpose disturbed him so much, Forky kept trying to return to his old way of life by breaking free of Woody’s grasp and jumping onto a trash can, as an attempt to rebel against his fate. As the film progressed and after more Forky rebellions, our adorable spork finally understood, with the help of Woody, that it is useless to keep resisting and that he had to accept reality and be Bonnie’s warm heap of trash. If you know (the reference), you know (the reference).

Gabby Gabby — your great destiny can be swept away in one fell swoop

She was initially creepy as hell. We must agree in unison. Gabby’s petrifying shell shed as the film progressed, and we got to see her motives for her “heinous” actions. From the get go, she was made to be the perfect companion for young girls from an older generation. Slowly reread the previous sentence and let it sink in. The poor doll had one thing missing to live the life she desired. I contest the human equivalent to this is being a billionaire who discovered the fountain of youth and shared it with her family and loved ones. The most tragic part of Gabby’s “life” is how she witnessed it countless times without living it, which resulted to her committing questionable actions. Desperation summons our self-centered nature.

Bo-Peep & Forky — hope.

While these three examples can bring our hopes down, broken spirits aren’t the only things that can spring from the wreck. Hope, a seemingly misplaced human necessity, sprang forth from the unlikeliest of heroes: Little Bo-Peep and Forky. After his initial setback, Forky finally out-wrestled his existential crisis and understood his role in Bonnie’s life: he was meant to be her trash can and make her feel warm, cozy, and safe. Bo-Peep, on the other hand, is an interesting case who deserves a separate piece on her own. She willingly broke free from her initial purpose and created one for herself. Her will was so sheer that it made Woody himself question his identity! This ultimately led to his departure as Woody, like Bo, now has a new purpose in life: to experience the life of “lost” toy.

It is true that the meaninglessness and uncertainties of the universe are horrifying, but we need not live in terror. The choice is up to us: we either succumb to fear of the unknown or overcome ourselves and effectively, everything else.

Ancient remedies for modern anxieties

Posted on Jul 4, 2019 by Jk Andrew

Anxiety is a word tossed around these days, for good reason. Many of us, if not all at some point, suffer from overthinking certain scenarios like it-could-have-beens (things that already happened) or what-could-bes (things that may or may not happen) resulting to an all too familiar case of anxiety. Regardless which, we can only agree that experiencing anxiety is not pleasurable. Our generation isn’t the first to experience such terrible thing. Centuries and even millennia-old people have grappled and eventually conquered anxieties from their respective eras, which fortunately withstood the test of time and are definitely applicable in our setting.

Meaningful or meaningless.

In an almost postmodern world, you ought to have encountered the question “is there meaning behind things” in one form or another. This question is inseparable to another: “is there a God” because if there IS, then most certainly there is also meaning behind things. Whether or not this god is omnipotent is for another time but for now, let us settle for He is. Since this God exists and has created everything, then everything that happens has a purpose for us to decipher and to learn from, which in turn, casts things in a web of cause and effect.

On the other, less friendly side of the spectrum is no deity. Then what, therefore, is the meaning of our existence? Why do we live? Who created us? The chain of questions goes on and on. This can either trap us in despair or empower us by deifying and bestowing to ourselves the ability to create meaning for everything that happens.

The best of you.

“Things won’t always go our way and that is okay! Give your best, and to fate, leave the rest.”

Regardless which, life happens with or without meaning and the only thing we can do is to act upon it. You can believe that the universe is on your side or that it is conspiring against you. Good and bad things happen to us, and if we desire a certain outcome then we must exert our best efforts to achieve it. We must remember, however, that doing our best is not an assurance that we will get that which we desire. Rather, it simply increases the odds that we do. We must understand that not everything is in our control and that we can only do so much. Things won’t always go our way and that is okay! Give your best, and to fate, leave the rest.

Amor Fati.

The Latin phrase for “love of fate”, Amor Fati is the attitude of fully embracing one’s situation or circumstance. Robert Greene tells us that:

“…the power that you can have in life of accepting your fate is so immense that it’s almost hard to fathom. You feel that everything happens for a purpose, and that it is up to you to make this purpose something positive and active.”

As we rationalize our fate, we will inevitably understand that it is ours alone and that the only reasonable thing to do is to embrace it. As absurd as it sounds (which it is), we have to realize that wishful thinking or despair changes nothing. The only appropriate response is embracing and acting on our fate, whatever it is.

Embrace and act on your fate. Work on your goals. If things don’t go the way you desire, then fine. If they do, then great. Be at peace in knowing that not everything is in your control. You’ll be fine.